We know by simple physics how a small rudder can steer a mighty ship. Did you know a small tongue can do the same for the human body? Read this astonishing verse from the Bible: “For we all stumble in many things. If anyone does not stumble in word, he is a perfect [mature] man, able also to bridle the whole body” (James 3:2).
Why is this amazing? Because it claims that if you can control the words that come out of your mouth, then you can control the whole body. And the “body” includes all of its thoughts, aptitudes, appetites, plans, and urges.
I want to be more mature, which means to be more like Christ, so this verse is really important to me. I have been a Christian following Christ for 40+ years. So I thought I would reverse-engineer how this verse works by looking over my past successes. By what spiritual principles does this work?
Let’s start with a guiding principle from Jesus Christ, found in Mark 7:20-21: “What comes out of a man, that defiles a man. For from within, out of the heart of men, proceed evil thoughts, adulteries, fornication, murders,” and the list goes on.
It stands to reason and experience that a violent person likewise has a mouth and facial expressions to match. One look at them and you know to avoid them. Since the whole body is united, the mouth problem is also a heart problem. The thoughts, words, facial expressions, and actions come from the same source.
I noticed that my words were hurting people around me. I thought nothing of the way I spoke because it was just me being me. But the looks on their faces showed me I wasn’t being like Christ in this area. So I began checking myself before I spoke.
By checking my interior life with honesty before speaking, I began dealing with issues I had ignored, and I went to prayer with each one. The principle from James 3:8 should give us pause: “But no man can tame the tongue. It is an unruly [unstable, inconstant, restless] evil, full of deadly poison.” We can’t tame the tongue, but the Lord can. That’s why we bring honest, humble prayers to Him with this terrible poison we all have. He alone has the antidote.
So before speaking, before going out to mingle with others, we get into the word of God and ask Him to reveal our hearts and the power of Jesus to overcome. Study your New Testament a chapter a day and work on the heart issues it raises. Bring them to the throne of grace.
Acknowledge that Jesus took that issue with Him to the cross, where it was fully judged, and to the grave, where He left it behind when He rose from the dead (Romans 6:3-10). When you trust your heart to Jesus as Lord, then your sins and the power backing them were left behind in the tomb, and you are risen in Christ. These thoughts should lie behind every Bible chapter you read.
So when I wanted to help others and not hurt them with my speech, I took time to think about how I would say it. It is vital that we see Christ in the Scriptures, how He lived and suffered in life. We can’t merely stop doing what’s wrong, but fill the vacuum left behind. We need to deliberately replace those thoughts and intentions with the example of Jesus. Jesus is the Son of God, and behind all of God’s attributes is love.
When I discovered pride and arrogance in me, I found it came out in my words. I was putting others down as a result. The way of Jesus is to treat them as people of dignity, since they were made in the image of God. I humbled myself and asked the Lord to work on that area. I prayed that I would approach people in love, which was very hard to do. Sometimes, the best I could do was keep my mouth shut instead of responding in kind.
When I saw how selfish I was, I saw how my words were all about me and what I cared about. As in the heart, so with my thoughts and words. I had to deliberately put myself on a level the same as others and interest myself in them before my words could change.
When I, a man, saw my thoughts very were uncharitable toward women, I needed the Lord to cleanse my heart and accept women as people made in the image of God to be cared for (not used), supported (not demeaned), and protected (not hunted). All these kinds of thoughts needed to be replaced as soon as I noticed them. Then I could truly mature in my conduct and words.
I found this verse about the tongue to be valuable, and the principles behind it meaningful. Behind all of God’s attributes is love. In all of our life changes, this engine should eventually drive all our interactions as well. (We’ll find that impossible around certain people and either laugh or wince at this advice.)
Since that’s the case for most of us, 2 Peter 1:5-8 gives us a slower and honorable roadmap we can follow to arrive at that place. The Lord will guide us every step of the way if we choose the path of righteousness, the path of Christ and the cross.
